The Eye of The Beholder (My Battles With Being Physically Perfect)

I wanted to look like the women in the above picture, but better because everywhere I looked these modelesque beings were getting all the attention, popularity that I wanted. The slim waist, the plump,round, perfect behind and the the long exotic hair whether it was a weave or not. I looked in the mirror each day and found something that I needed to change. My nose too flat, my bottom lip poked out too far, I thought I had cellulite on the back of my thighs, My tummy wasnt flat enough, my breast too floppy. My hair too thick, my eyes too big, I have love handles the list went on and on and on. Every day I woke up in the morning and saw an uglier, fatter, horrendous chick.
 I started taking diet pills first to try to curb my appetite, but they didn't work, and it seemed as though they were making me more hungrier. I then started buying lean cuisines to take on my lunch break,which not only made me very hungry, but also very fatigued and dizzy from lack of a balanced meal. I couldn't join a gym because I had a hectic work schedule from working at a call center, and wouldn't have the time. I also had a midday shift that didn't give me time to walk around a track or block and due to lack of me having a car I didnt have a way to the gym, track anyway.
  I started saving up for plastic surgery, one body part at a time, starting with my nose that I couldn't stand. I hated the fact that when I smiled my nose spread and covered my whole face (I thought so). Sometimes I would pinch it throughout the day to make it more narrow and less wide, and of course that didn't work. I also started saving up for a tummy tuck. I always had that little pouch that would stick out just little from my blouses.
  One day I was researching and just googling different things (some of the weird things I do when I'm bored). I started researching different African Queens that existed before slavery, and the most beautiful, thick women popped up. There were women with noses bigger than mine, who adorned garments of beautiful fabric, gold, and crowns encrusted with precious jewels. They were not slim, but healthily stacked, curvy, and their lips were thick, plump, and colored bright red which curved into a sweet yet strong smile. I was astonished and shocked at the same time! These women looked like me, some only darker and some only lighter but some exactly. Eyes and all!

 I resembled a queen! Well that alone stopped me from saving up for cosmetic surgery to take these beautiful features away I was blessed with. Instead of popping diet pills, starving myself on Lean Cuisine diets and skipping meals, I started eating more fruits and vegetables. I read books on eating healthy satisfying meals and that helped a lot too. I also learned that if we all looked alike, this world would be very boring, and that no one loves us like we love ourselves.